Hustle-Porn and Conversation With My Future Self
I've been working on enjoying my life more lately. Enjoying the good and the bad, the positive feelings and the negative.
I got really good at zapping the fun out of things, thinking seriousness was necessary to not only get the job done, but also to do it well.
I was always good at hustling.
Not the kind of hustling where you swindle people out of money. The kind where your basketball coach would say something like "Great hustle Poelman!"
I started thinking that to do a good job, you had to really bring that intense energy. Not just 100% but 110%, right?
Over-Hustling
But it turns out you can over-hustle.
I sometimes find myself in such a hurry to get the job done that I don't take the time to stop and plan out how to get the job done well. I don't take the time to enjoy the process.
"There's no time for that. I just need to get it done." So I dive in.
Hustle Porn
I've heard this referred to as Hustle Porn. That term makes me laugh.
I get in such a hurry for the end result that I don't take the time to do the things that will actually get me to the end result.
Why?
Because I thought my worthiness was on the line. If I believe I'll be more worthy once I reach my goal, I'll feel in a hurry.
With this mindset I'm believing that I'm not worthy now.
If you are in this zone, if you feel in a hurry to learn how to not look at porn (or any goal you have), you are not in the mindset that will help you achieve your goal.
Here's what I'm focusing on right now.
I am already worthy. I already have greatness. I cannot add to my worthiness or greatness from what I achieve.
The reason to go after a goal that stretches me then changes. So I pick a goal that brings up all sorts of doubts and insecurities (signs of a good goal), a goal that even seems impossible.
And the reason I go for it is so I can identify and work through all of the limiting beliefs that come up. It helps me to remove my limiting beliefs that are getting in the way of me seeing how great and worthy I already am.
Read that last paragraph again if you need to. It's an important one. It's a paradigm shift for many of us.
Conversation With My Future Self
This is a really helpful exercise.
When I asked my future self (the guy who has already achieved my goals) what advice he had for me, here's what he said:
- You're going to get there (With absolute certainty. He has no doubt.)
- It's going to happen.
- It won't pan out how you expect it - but be willing to fail and keep going.
- You're going to get really good at failing.
- Keep going. You're going to make it happen.
- You don't know the exact "how" of it now and you don't need to. It will unfold as you keep going/trying/failing/moving forward.
I want to start thinking/feeling/acting like him now. I want to become him.
This is an Einsteinian approach instead of a Newtonian approach.
I want to keep hanging out with this guy. Listening to him helps me be more:
- patient
- courageous
- focused
- committed
- resilient
- accepting of where I am at in the overall process
More Enjoyment + Job Done Well
In short, I enjoy my life more right now. And the moments to come. The good and the bad. The positive and the negative.
I don't over-hustle the joy out of life.
And, I get to make my goals happen.
The best athletes know when to bring the intensity and when to pull off the gas a bit. I think this helps them get injured less, perform better under pressure, and even enjoy themselves more.
Turns out you can get the job done and enjoy the process at the same time.
I'm happy to have been wrong about this.
In fact, enjoying the process helps me to do a better job, and to do it sustainably.
I'm curious to see where I can get with this.
If you want to learn to go porn free and live life the way you want to, I can help you. I know reaching out can be tough. I get it. But it's so worth it.
It is confidential, between you and me. All we are going to do is talk about where you are at, where you want to be, and how I can help you.
You literally have nothing to lose from doing a free consult with me. I'll make it as easy on you as I can.
Even if you don't begin working with me, the consult can help you determine your next step.
It could be just what you need to start moving toward the life you want.
