Work With Me

Who I Am, Who I Help, & How I Help Them

My name is Danny Poelman.

I’m a Certified, Expert Life Coach.

I certified at the Life Coach School (with Brooke Castillo) right when the program was at its peak level of effectiveness (in my opinion).

I’m a husband and father of 3 kids.

My family and I have lived on the French Riviera for the last 6 years.

I love basketball, being in the sun/nature, and moving my body.

This year, lifting weights is my favorite, with running/biking/swimming in between.

My thinking/analyzing brain loves science-based processes.

I also love and value spirituality. I grew up Mormon and am no longer Mormon. Many (not all) of my clients have also been either Mormon or Post-mormon or something in between. I love coaching all the different nuanced people in between.

I get people who grew up in conservative, high-demand religions.

I continually find ways to open and expand my spirituality. I enjoy exploring and continually learning.

I’m a highly sensitive person with big emotions. This, at times, has felt like a nuisance.

Now, I know how to channel it as a super power in my coaching. It is part of what makes me such a great coach.

And, yes, I still have some difficulty managing it in the meantime (it’s an ongoing practice).

I am a super-listener, because I listen with more than just the 5 senses.

People find it easy to open up to me because of some of my natural tendencies/gifts.

I practiced as a dentist for 3 years (graduated from University of Southern California Dental School). I've also coached many doctors through the years (because I get them as well).

I stopped working as a dentist because my hands started shaking.

This was one of many physically limiting symptoms that came up for me as my body was finally ready to process trauma from being sexually abused as a young boy.

I am a Complex PTSD survivor.

It took me years to get through the toughest parts of healing.

I still have more to do, but I can function at a high level and have room for the continual nature of that healing process.

It gets better and better.

One of the ways I coped in the past was with a pornography habit. Ultimately I didn’t want it in my life but I would do it anyway.

Through my journey of healing, I tried everything from:

many different therapists and types of therapy
EMDR therapy
cognititve behavioral therapy
sex addiction therapists (even though I was only viewing porn every 3-6 weeks, I thought I needed this back then)
IFS, or Parts Work
Neurofeedback
psychiatrist
medication
12-steps
acupuncture
chiropractors
energy workers
different types of meditation
mindfulness
many other (my psychiatrist told me “you’ve tried more things than any of my patients”)

I like being open and finding what works to create actual results.

I did a lot of healing from trauma through all of this.

Was still stuck with the porn habit even after all that.

Found life coaching (after seeing its impact on my wife, Lindsay). Finally helped me break free from my unwanted habit.

Got certified as a Life Coach.

Was one of the first, if not the first, to adapt powerful mindset tools from the life coach school (originally used for sustainable weight loss) to help quit a porn habit.

It has proven incredibly effective.

Everyone says it’s the most helpful thing they’ve tried when they go through this coaching process with me.

I worked with men for 6+ years, full time.

Through my personal experience and my experience as a coach, I’ve seen it all.

I now coach men and women (or however you identify) on all sorts of subjects.

People who bring their whole selves to the coaching process are the best fit.

The methodology is Thought Work, but with a holistic approach.

We use the tools/methodology to powerfully address a specific goal you have in life.

Also, we coach on anything coming up in your life along the way that feels important, or feels like a block.

We address the root of the issue (starts at the habitual thought level).

My clients create sustainable transformation through this process.

In other words, it sticks.

They leave with tools they can use for life to address all sorts of goals in their life.

They leave their unwanted porn habit (or other) of years and years behind for good. With confidence and self-trust.

Clients come to me for coaching on 1 or 2 things.

We end up coaching on lots of things.

I typically coach smart, high-achieving people who want to train their brain to transform habits, heal, or enrich their life at the next level.

Some of my areas of expertise that I am uniquely qualified to coach people through are:

Unwanted habits (porn/other)
Excessive People-Pleasing
Anxiety/Depression
C-PTSD, Unresolved Trauma (post therapy or in conjunction with)
Religious and Relational Trauma from narcissistic abuse
Money Mindset (and manifestation principles for those who enjoy it)
Business coaching for solopreneurs
Self-care for burnt out doctors (or other professionals) and stress management
Marriage/relationship coaching

Also, I’m an Ally (LGBTQ+). I want this to be crystal clear.

I don’t push agendas on clients. They bring their own agenda. We get to go where you want when you’re ready to go there.

Meeting with a coach regularly gives you the opportunity to observe your mind along the way, build rapport with each other, and create a space in which your brain can feel safe to explore, question, identify limiting beliefs (or beliefs inhibiting healing), and transform your life by transforming your mind.

An inside-out approach is the kind that lasts and builds momentum. This allows for more ease and flow, and less hustle/burnout.

I lean heavily on science-based approaches and the science of how the human brain works.

We play around with wu-wu/manifestation for those clients who find that enriching/fun (optional).

I LOVE my clients. This is another one of my gifts as a coach. I remember details about my clients. I keep them strictly confidential. But I use my deep knowing to enhance the individual coaching process. You don’t ever have to tell me anything you don’t want to.

For those who embrace this process, the changes my clients experience are profound.

It works better for people who don’t try to say what they think I want to hear. But who will voice it when they feel resistance to something. And we don’t push, but challenge, question, and explore. The way for you becomes clear with this curious, non-judgmental approach.

You are already incredibly powerful. This coaching process helps you realize that power that is already within you.

The 3 principles mentioned in my motto are:

Transform Habits.
Heal Your Mind.
Enrich Your Life.

Transform Habits:

This has to do with behavioral habits as well as thinking/feeling habits your automatic brain has learned.

I am a master at helping people train the habits in their brain in a new way.

Heal Your Mind:

Healing is part of why I am here on this earth. I don’t do the healing for you.

I help you discover your own self-healing capabilities to a further extent than ever.

Unlearning some of the damaging thought-patterns you’ve learned (through traumatic past or other) is something we can always be on the lookout for. We make room for it.

Enrich Your Life:

I love the word, “enrich.” With unwanted habits, we learn to make your life so good that that habit becomes irrelevant.

We learn new ways of interacting with the negative feelings too.

We up-level your relationship with yourself and your ability to follow through on commitments to yourself. Also, we reprogram your mind to making more money if that’s something you desire. See the multiple meanings of “enrich” here?

Now that you have a feel for me, if you want to explore options to get help from me, schedule a free consult with me now.

SCHEDULE A FREE CONSULT

You are not broken. You already have the right machinery. It's just a matter of learning to use that machinery more skillfully.

John's Results

The things I have learned from [Danny] and have implemented have made all the difference in my recovery. These things don't just apply to porn and masturbation they also apply to life in general. This is well worth the time and cost!”

Scott's Results

I had been able to find some success with various programs intended to avoid pornography. Sometimes I could make it 3-6 months, sometimes even a year or longer between episodes, but I never felt like I was in control. It felt like at any moment, I might have an urge and not be able to resist and I’d be down a losing spiral again. The anxiety was crushing and I felt worthless, ashamed, and helpless to control my circumstances.

In other programs I’d participated in, I felt like we never got to the the level of practical tools. There was a gap between my goal and the actions I could take to actually get there. The goal was clear, but how to achieve success was much less so. I wanted more than a hope and pray strategy, I wanted actionable intelligence that combined what I knew of brain science with my own spiritual goals and expectations. I wanted to exercise my own faith to succeed, but I wanted tools I could use to get there.

About four months into the process, I had a “Neo” moment, like at the end of the first Matrix movie, when he finally realizes he can control his environment and can see the world for what it really was. I had experienced an urge, and instead of autopilot taking over and following a familiar path to undesirable outcomes, I was able to stand apart from my urges, acknowledge them for what they were, and choose to dismiss them. I felt like I was in complete control, which was a totally new experience. I could choose the outcome myself. It was so empowering, it was the breakthrough I was looking for. I knew in that moment that even if I failed again in the future, I’d hit a turning point and there’s no going back.

I’m so much more conscious of my feelings and how those are part of my life. I’m so much more aware of myself and my thoughts and have been able to intentionally direct my thoughts in more productive directions. I was looking for a game changer, and I feel like Danny’s program delivered that. My anxiety over this issue is gone. My sense of control is a thousand times better. It’s like night and day. The shame and despair I used to feel are gone. I am more confident, and I feel so much more capable. I’ve been able to use these same principles in every aspect of my life to great benefit. I feel like I’m in complete control of my life, perhaps for the first time ever. Not in the sense that I can control events, but that I can choose how I respond to them, and that is powerful.

How in control are you now with porn/masturbation? (0 = completely out of control, 10 = I have complete control)

Scott’s response: “10”

Trey's Results

My biggest challenge prior to working with Danny was finding the desire to make the change. There was a desire, but learning to grow that desire to the point that I made the change for myself.

I believe all my prior experience prepared me for this program with Danny. It was different with Danny because it felt like the real deal. We were getting down to the root(s) of the problem rather than just "replacing the band-aid" on my wounds.

The moment when I realized this process was actually working to solve my problem:

That moment for me was when I realized how simple the answer really was for me. My brain had always tried to make it more complicated than what was actually right in front of me the whole time. I had never lost control, I only believed I had.

Today I still have urges. Life still goes on and there are sad moments along with the happy moments. But now, I am able to fully embrace each emotion. There is an overall feeling of content and joy in my life, completely independent of anyone or anything. I no longer feel the need to fill "the void" in my life with pornography/masturbation because there is no void!

My perspective has completely changed. I have learned to better control my thoughts and emotions and I have never been happier with life than right now! I am even sleeping better! :)

How in control are you now with porn/masturbation? (0 = completely out of control, 10 = I have complete control)

Answer: 10

Mike S.'s Results

"My biggest challenge was just crossing the finish line. I felt stalled right at the end of the race and couldn't seem to get there on my own.

I have a much better story to tell myself about addiction, which has lead to a dramatic reduction in urges for porn. I say without hyperbole, that I feel free from addiction."

Scale of 1-10, How in control are you now with porn/masturbation? “9.9999998 :)”

I want to be like Mike and schedule a free Consult now

Jake's Results

My biggest challenge prior to coaching with Danny was not being able to quit porn. It made me feel overwhelmed and hopeless.

This coaching experience is different than other things I've tried. I stopped trying to resist urges on willpower alone, contrary to what we're often told to do in the Church, and it helped so much. It was also way more uncomfortable at times, and Danny pushed me consistently in a supportive way.

I realized this process was actually working when I actually committed to my protocol and realized that I wasn't actually in my right mind going to watch porn again.

Many things have changed after working with Danny. Where do I even start? Other than my mission, these past few months have been the most formative of my life. I have grown in ways I never thought possible.

Here are just a few results:

I stopped watching porn.

I have reached a new level of increased self-acceptance and self-love.

I have made major breakthroughs in dating and interpersonal vulnerability.

I forgave my family members after years of holding grudges.

I am more self-aware of my thoughts and which ones serve me well.

I have stopped using the "checklist" mentality on dates and focus more on how well we connect.

I have become way more comfortable with uncertainty.

Past Client Ben's Results (Interview Audio): Make Life So Good Porn Becomes Irrelevant

Interviewed 1 year after we stopped working together. Ben describes how he benefited during coaching with me and also well after coaching with me as he continued to apply the tools he learned in the program.

1 of top 3 best decisions of his life
1 year later: life is better than he imagined it could be
as an entrepreneur, he doubled his salary (we coached on business as well)
totally in control (not only with porn, but in many areas of his life)

Listen in now to hear Ben's inspiring results he created for himself through this coaching process.

Want results like these for you?

I Want Results Like Ben's

Client Interview, How Mike Beatty 10 X'ed His Prior Results with Other Therapists/Coaches/Methods

I want to 10X my results like Mike Beatty

I want results Like Justin's

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